2012

I just wrote a whole recap of 2011 in my journal, but it ended up sounding over-generalized and canned, so I abandoned it. I didn't feel that it was an accurate reflection of how I experienced God or life this past year, and I don't suppose I can condense those thoughts and feelings into a single post without feeling completely exhausted by it.

It's 3pm and I sit on the couch in our family room.  Tess naps and Lucy is creating a ruckus in her room.  Chris is paying bills.  I just drank a cup of hot coffee and ate some left over brownies.  My jeans are snug around the waste.  I made a long grocery list and it seems hard to believe that after all the feasting this holiday season, we still must eat.

Chris took down the Christmas decorations a couple of days ago.  I put the final things back in their rightful place this morning around the house.  I love how the house looks suddenly empty.  The sky is clear outside and the trees are bare.  I enjoy the simplicity, the scantness, of the dawn of a new year.  There is room for new possibilities, room for change.

Tomorrow I think I'll pull the wilting and dried up flowers out of the pots in our yard.  A few blooms have survived up until now, but I have a sudden hankering to dig everything up and let the dirt rest alone for a few months.

2012 will be a year of many anticipated changes, many future unknowns, and guaranteed chaos.  I am refocusing my mind on the present, the here and now, because this is where God is, this is where He meets and renews me, and I don't want to miss a thing.  So, if I had to make a New Years resolution, this would be it. Mindfulness. Awareness. My life is happening, right now. This is it, and I am in it.